Shall We Dance?

In New Albany's current longest-running melodrama, Gary "The Gary" McCartin returned once again to plead with the city council to overturn the recommendation of the Plan Commission and permit him to leverage a dime or two out of a piece of land on Charlestown Road across from the Kroger grocery and the Old Mill shopping complex.

By his own testimony, "The Gary" has taken ten bites of the apple on this development, which he hopes will be the start of his comeback after one or more of his ventures resorted to the protections of 11 U.S.C. It remains unanswered whether "The Gary" actually owns the parcel(s) under zoning review or if he merely holds an option that he intends to exercise when and if he is able to corral 5 votes from the New Albany City Council.

In a defensive, yet challenging 40-minute presentation, "The Gary" pleaded his case. The totally non-conflicted D5, Diane McCartin-Benedetti, engaged her sibling in a precious back and forth Q&A that warmed the cockles of everyone in the room who had cockles, whatever those are.

But the long, lingering kiss that was D5's interrogation was upstaged by the erotic dance staged by At-Large Council Member Jack Messer and the man who when called "arrogant" responded with the query, "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?"

Messer, whose clear intent was to find a win-win outcome, chose to speak publicly to "The Gary" in a way that was probably more appropriate for a private venue. Sensing an opportunity to score points, "The Gary" chose to whip-cast for trout, but the elusive Messer, pure in heart, simply continued to offer well-meant advice that would, presumably, allow "The Gary" to achieve his objective without creating another intransigent coterie of folks all too willing to tell you what they think of the Sprawlmeister.

So you think you can dance? I hear Brazil is lovely this time of year, and the Samba Endredo is pretty easy to learn.